4 menacing realities impacting kids
Parents say they wish these things had never been invented.
Originally published in the Moultrie News.
There’s no question this week because I want to tell you about a recent survey published in the New York Times that asked parents to complete this sentence: “When I think about my child’s experience growing up, I wish ___ had never been invented.” The results are telling, with a majority of parents pointing to these four things:
4. Social Media (55 percent)
For this category, we can fold in five other things on the list: Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, TikTok and, X.
Since its creation, social media has been a scourge on adolescents — and now even younger children. On the surface, maybe it sounds (to some) like a great idea to have kids sharing their lives with peers and strangers. But the experiment has had grave consequences for kids’ mental and social development.
Social media is tied to higher rates of anxiety, depression and sleep disruption. It exposes kids to cyberbullying and sexual harassment. It drags down academics, increases suicidal thoughts and — thanks to addictive algorithms — traps kids in endless scrolling.
And for what? Social media offers nothing that could possibly justify its cost. It doesn’t foster more positive relationships. It doesn’t help kids learn, mature or manage stress. At best, it wastes time, which is one of the most precious resources kids have, so why train them to waste it? As Thoreau said, you can’t kill time without injuring eternity.
3. Alcohol (57 percent)
Studies show that about one in every 10 drinkers will develop a lifelong alcohol dependence. Addiction often runs in the genes, so the earlier kids taste their first drop, the earlier they could become alcoholics.
But addiction isn’t the only danger. Alcohol also causes a range of other problems for kids, including higher risks of car crashes, drowning and assaults.
What we didn’t know for a long time, but have recently discovered, is that alcohol is also giving kids cancer. In fact, it’s the third leading preventable cause of cancer in the US. Just this year, the US Surgeon General declared: “Alcohol is a well-established, preventable cause of cancer responsible for about 100,000 cases of cancer and 20,000 cancer deaths annually in the United States — greater than the 13,500 alcohol-associated traffic crash fatalities per year in the US — yet the majority of Americans are unaware of this risk.” Girls seem especially vulnerable, with alcohol accounting for 17 percent of all breast cancer cases.
Research suggests that as little as one drink a day increases cancer risk, and scientists now agree that no level of alcohol is safe for consumption.
Of course, alcohol hurts not just teens, but also parents who drink heavily, indirectly harming and inflicting pain on their children. That pain likely influenced this survey response.
2. Guns (62 percent)
Parents’ fears about guns are likely shaped by mass school shootings, which have killed roughly 500 people since Columbine in 1999.
But the danger goes beyond headline tragedies. Many students live in communities where guns and gang violence are a daily threat. Even parents in safer neighborhoods may worry about whether their children’s peers have access to firearms.
1. Mature Online Content (72 percent)
This topped the list by a wide margin. With computers and smartphones, kids have free, easy access to pornography, and no matter how hard parents try to restrict it, kids can always find a way out.
The darker truth is that as online porn has proliferated, its content has grown more brutal. This has led to the development of pathologies. Studies show pornography distorts kids’ expectations of sexuality, especially among boys. It fosters transactional, unrealistic views of relationships and often undermines the ability to form healthy romantic bonds — hence the saying: “Porn kills love.”
I’m very sorry, parents. We might wish none of these things had ever been invented, but they exist, and they’re not going away. We cannot sweep them under the rug or hope our kids will dodge their bullets. The best protection is an open, ongoing dialogue combined with rational restrictions. Silence won’t shield children, but honest conversation might.
Jody Stallings has been an award-winning teacher in Charleston since 1992 and is director of the Charleston Teacher Alliance. To submit a question, order his books, or follow him on social media, please visit JodyStallings.com.